Justice...

We're sitting around the kitchen table at home talking about what justice is and then the next thin you know we're in Leeds sitting around a very different kitchen table, in Carmella's kitchen, who's raised five boys on her own on a government estate (think the projects or what a bunch of people living on welfare together would look like.) And in the middle of this depressing, depressed place, she has built the most beautiful garden. Its like she has grown life back into the place, and when you pass by her home you can't help but feel a sense of hope. These people are living in a circular depression. Generation after generation is caught up in receiving hand outs from the government and not working, and not having the ability to break free. We want to think up a way to bring life into the place. Carmella asked us to help plant a garden, which seems like a nice way to throw some color into the place. I mean we're only here for a week so doing relational things with the community is difficult. The people are very protective so trying to do stuff with the kids gets tricky. Me and Sara got yelled at for starting a game of tag with some of the kids on a bit of grass because the parents didn't know who we were. Which on some levels its good because it means they are looking out for their kids and not so depressed and caught up in drugs that they don't care.

The word justice hasn't ever felt real to me before. But how can you come to a place with so many needy people and not desire for justice to be carried out? How can you not desire for equality and dignity. I don't know how God is going to use us here, i don't know what He wants to teach us, but I do know that we are going to walk away from here different people. That we will care more for the poor, for those in need. God says he is just, and therefore He must desire that we care for His people who are in need. So my prayer is that the Lord will show me how to care.

All I can do is pray...

I don't know how to write it all. Even if you were sitting right here I don't think I could explain it. Here. Life. All the things God is doing in me and speaking in me and doing through me. I don't know how to explain it all. Its good. Its hard. My heart is broken for these people. Its the classic small town nothing to do and Dads gone so why don't we just drown out the boredom and pain with drugs and alcohol. Sometimes the cup of tea and small talk just don't seem like enough. But its all we can do. We pray whenever we can. All I can do is pray. They need Jesus. End of story. Without Him their lives have no purpose, they have no hope. I wish I could make them see that.

Life

So reading through my blog I've noticed that I haven't been very good at telling ya'll what I'm actually doing here. So I'm gonna tell you a little about the daily life of this week and next.

Sunday: Because we are from all different places and aren't associated with any particular church or denomination, we have this awesome ability to go to any church and talk about the Boiler room and what it represents and try to get people from all different churches involved in it. Most of the Boiler Room community goes to TCF (Thurrock Christian Fellowship), but they would like to see all different people involved. For the past two weeks, and next two weeks, we're at the Baptist church. The Baptist church actually owns the house that we rent, so its pretty cool to get to know them. They've actually asked us to lead the children's church next Sunday, so I've got that whole lesson planned out and we will be leading it. Pray that it goes well, my lesson is on Missions, and we're gonna tell the story of Paul, and then talk to them about why we're here doing missions and what Gods been doing in our lives. I'm excited to see God work in that, and hopefully we will be able to get the Baptist more involved in community outreach.

Monday: On Monday mornings we have prayer at 217, the Boiler House, and then we spend some time cooking, cleaning and preparing for all the projects we do. I am currently working on a lot of awesome projects. We have a week of prayer coming up the 19th- 26th of October, and Transit is heavily involved in the planning of it, we are organizing and leading worship. I made the rotor for it, and we are redecorating the prayer room. Since the Boiler rooms in Guilford and Reading are having prayer rooms the same week that are focused on Human Trafficking, I thought it would be cool if we allowed that to be a focus in ours as well. So I'm doing some research and gonna make a poster on it, and maybe talk about it at one of the first worship sessions. Also on Mondays we have God Story teaching, which is basically going through the Bible in these ten months that we are here, but in such a way that we can better understand how the whole Bible relates and give us the ability to teach it to others. This week Alana taught us the story of Isaac and Jacob, its pretty cool to get other peoples perspectives on the Bible.

At night we had house meal, which is where anyone who is part of the community can come to a dinner and we all just sit together and eat and enjoy getting to know one another and just hang out. The Trannies had to cook the dinner, so me and Sara decided to make tacos. I was a little nervous because I had never made homeade salsa before, and the ingredients they have here are so different from home, but there was none left and people asked for my recipe, so that made me really happy :)

Tuesday: Morning prayers from 8-9 at the boiler house. Then what we do on Tuesdays rotates from week to week. Last week we did besom and worked on this single mother, Sam's house. We are completely redecorating her house, so we spent all of last week cleaning the walls and preparing them to be painted, and then next week we will hopefully get to finish sanding and start painting. I'm really excited to get to know her and bless her. She just seems like she is in desperate need of Jesus' love. This Tuesday we had more teaching. Andy Freeman came down from Reading and talked to us about Community and the Trinity. I had never thought about how much the two relate, but its so true that the Trinity is the ultimate example of what community should look like. It was such an amazing talk. He really is an incredible guy, I just wanted to soak up all his knowledge, I could sit all day and here what God has been doing in Reading.

Wednesday: Study day! We have morning prayers from 9-10, then I pray from 11 to 12 for my own personal prayer slot. Then I met with Anne, my amazing mentor who is just so wise. Basically Wednesdays are days to catch up on all our reading (Which there is ALOT of, I'm currently reading 4 books), and to spend some time with God and just relax in him and seek out what He is doing and just let Him speak to us. Most Wednesday nights we try to have people over, its our hospitality night. This week we had Tony and Lina from Kosova over. They are full time missionaries there, and in a nation of two million people, less the 1% are Christians. They do work with the gypsies that basically have nothing, and they are the pastors of a church. I think it would so incredible to go out some time and work with them for a summer.

Thursday: Bar N Bus day! We have morning prayers from 8-9 at the boiler house, and then we try to clean and take care of house stuff. Yesterday I spent a couple of hours preparing for the evening. Us girl Trannies are planning a girl's night for the Bar N Bus girls on Sunday. So Ange and I made up the flyers and permission slips and I called people to get everything set up. I am just so excited for this event! We're all gonna share our testimonies and give them time to ask us questions, but mainly we're just gonna do nails and girly things and let the Holy Spirit have time to move. I don't know exactly what God wants to do there, but i know its gonna be something awesome! When we handed out the invitations, they were all so excited, and all said they were coming, I don't know if they will, but I hope they do. I've been praying for them so much, I just really love these girls. I got to have my first deep conversation where they really told me about their lives last night, so I'm feeling really encouraged. I know God wants to use us to bless them and show them His love.

Today (Friday): We do morning prayers differently on Fridays, we usually prayer walk through the town and just allow Him to speak to us. We all go off in our own directions and just pray for whatever God is calling us to pray for. Its pretty cool :) Then from 12:30 until like 3 we are at Palmers College, which is like high school, and we just hang out with the kids during their lunch hour, build some relationships, chat, hopefully pray for them. Not sure what God wants us to be doing there yet, but its where we're at right now, and I know Gods gonna use us somehow. Friday nights we do prayer walking through the town again, but its more purposeful. We leave half the team back at the house to pray, and the other half goes out and prays for people in the town and just looks for opportunities to affect the town. Last week I stayed back and prayed with Jo and it was just such a beautiful time with God. But I think I'll go out this week and see what God does :)

Saturday: Not sure what I'll be up to tomorrow, but Saturdays are our free days. Last week me, Sara and Jo drove into Brighton since everyone else was in Amsterdam for the 247 prayer conference and we wanted to do something fun too. I think I might go up to the mall and buy some stuff for the Girl's Night on Sunday. Not sure what else.

So there is my very long blog on what my life here is like. Its pretty great, we are constantly involved in the community, and we have fun doing it.

Hot pink umbrellas

I'm experiencing my first week of awful English weather... it really is as awful as everyone says. Apparently the changes in air pressure can cause headaches, which has become very apparent to me! So its been a bit of a frustrating week, what with this cold I can't seem to shake and the headaches, but at the same time God has been amazing. I went for a walk the other day in an attempt to shake the frustration that seemed to be looming. And I just starting to sing and cry out to God, but my body was just filled with despair, and everywhere I looked was gray and gloomy and sadness. My heart was so heavy. I began to cry, and ask God why He brought me here to this place, Lord how can I be used here, I said, how do you use someone so inadequate, so filled riddled with depression? Then in the midst of all this dreariness I looked up and saw a school girl with a hot pink umbrella and a daisy yellow scarf. And it was like God was saying its ok, I'll provide for you, even if that provision is a little bit of color. And I smiled. My tear streaked face felt the glow of Christ's love. It was such a precious moment of truth. Just to know that He cares for the small needs. I am so blessed. So blessed to have been called to this place, so blessed with an awesome community of believers that surround me daily, and truly care about me, and so blessed to get to serve a community of people who need Jesus. Who knows where God will call me after this, but the awesome thing is that wherever that is, I know He will protect me.

Bonhoeffer

One of our homeworks for this week was to read Bonhoeffer's "Life Together," 18 pages in and I was calling out to God. Its talks about community, and about being grateful for what you have rather than criticizing. And I realized how often I complain about the fact that things aren't the way I want them to be, but God is changing my outlook on life. I am so grateful for the community I have here. Sure there are things I would change if I was running everything, but thats just it, I"M NOT, GOD IS! Thank goodness for that! Because He does so much better than I ever could. He has this whole big plan that I can't see and its just so exciting to get to be in the middle of it. I can see God moving around me, how incredible is that? Constant community is the most amazing thing, this morning I met with my mentor Anne, and she just encouraged me to keep asking God for more of Him and more of what He has for me, because He wants to give us more than we can possibly think or imagine. Then I got a chance to be myself in the Boiler House, I blasted Hillsong London, and praised Jesus at the top of my lungs. Love those prayer times when its just you and God and He meets you there. Then, God teaching me about community as He likes to do, I ran into Carla and got to hear all about what shes been doing in the schools and prayed for her on my walk home. Everywhere i went today, i got to see people that I know, people that i'm building relationships with, people who need Jesus, or encouragement or encouraged me. I got home to a houseful of studious people, and got some insight into God Story, ate some lunch (stir fry from last night, when we had a full table and silence, I think that means I did good) then one of the girls that is doing God Story with me, Hannah, picked me up and we went back to her house to do some studying/debating, and figured out we know nothing but its fun to decipher what the Bible says on all the random topics we come across in our reading. Then her brother Simeon's car broke down so we went and jumped it for him, just another example of what a tight-nit community they have over here. Then when i got home it was time to start thinking about dinner and Steve brought over a friend. Mike made us some awesome Bangers and mash (which is sausage and mashed potatoes). I love that we have an open house where anyone really is welcome at any time. Its awesome to me that people just drop in. I've always wanted to have a home like that, so having it here is amazing. Basically, today God has showed me what a blessing living in community is and that I shouldn't take it for granted, but that i should instead be grateful everyday for the beautiful people surrounding me. :)

His daily places

Its been so incredible to me to just see how all my daily places are where God works. A visit to Morrisons isn't just to grab some milk, but its an opportunity to run into the local kids and pray with them, its a chance to learn the Grocers name and build relationships. For the first time in my life I'm learning what it means to be a missionary. Not just go on a missions trip, but to be a missionary wherever you are. I'm falling so in love with my Jesus. I have always known and loved Him, but being far away from home, and so far out of my comfort zone, its just made me realize how dependant I am on Him. I am so excited with how I have already started to build relationships in the community. There is this group of girls, that are abotu 14 years old and I've been seeing them everywhere. I just love them! God has totally put them on my heart. Be praying for them, especially for Charlotte and Amy, they are so intersted in who God is and prayer. I can totally see God getting to them this year. Angelique and I want to start a girls group for them on Sundays, and they are all really interested in coming. Hopefully that will get started up with just some mani/pedis and Jesus. I think it will be a good combo :) Life here is starting to settle in. It feels like home. I think I could make my home anywhere as long as I knew God wanted me there. And I know God wants me here. I've really never been so sure of anything in my life. I have a purpose here, and I love living a purposeful life. God is so amazing, we're reading through the Bible together and I'm amazed everyday and who He is. I'm amazed at how great He is, and that at the same time, He knows me intimately. He is so good!

Stretched and Strained

We had our first two days of teaching and my mind feels like its going to explode. I'd always thought that I had an extensive knowledge of the Bible compared to most, and perhaps I do, but the truth is, the more I know, the more I discover there is to know. The vastness of my God is unfathomable. The first Bar N Bus night was like nothing I've ever experienced before. I mean these kids genuinly wanted me to pray for them. They weren't like American kids who are just so fed up with Christianity, or who are all "christians" whether or not they know what that means. These kids listened intently to what I said and prayed and were excited to meet me. Its been crazy here, feels like I've known everyone for months or years. I prayed so long for friends, for a real community, and now that I have it I'm just so overwhelmed. Its amazing. I could not have asked God for better people to spend this journey with. I'm os far out of my comfort zone, but I love it. I love knowing that God is going to change me so much more than I could possibly imagine because I'm not in my normal place. I can already see people that He wants me to spend time with and encourage, I just can't wait to see the transformation take place. Thats the cool thing about being in a small community. You can really see the changes take place. The things that happen over the next ten months will actually have an effect that I can see. There is so much gunk in me, and I know that God is going to slowly errode all of that. I hope that when I return ten months from now, you won't even recognise me because I have become so wholly immersed in Christ.

Going crazy in England...

Yesterday a group of eight Christians walked into a room full of 88 first year dance students to offer them a welcome bag full of maps, restaurant guides and small gifts. While we were at first hesitant of what their reaction would be, we received a warm welcome. They were grateful to receive such a loving gift after a hard first week of training. They all arrive everyday at 8am and don’t stop their training until after 6:30 or in some cases 9pm, so people who just wanted to bless them and offer a welcome into their community had a profound effect. Already, 22 people have signed up for the free Indian meal with Alpha that is occurring tonight. You could see the look of shock come across their faces when they heard there were cappuccino and soup packets in the bag. We were able to delve quickly into conversations as we passed out the bags and shared why we were there. We hope that our genuine concern about them fitting into the community will intrigue them and they will desire to get to know us better and will come to the pasta dinner. It was such an awesome opportunity to get to minister to them and hopefully those relationships will grow over time and we'll be able to make an impact on them. Also last night, we went to the mall to get a phone for me, and we had all been talking about getting piercings, so I got my cartilage pierced. Flippin awesome right? :)



I got to help Lisa Anderson set things up for her shop this morning, which sells things that Women in India make and then gives the money back to the women. Tonight is our first night with Bar N' Bus, so pray that the kids will be receptive and we'll be able to build relationships with them.

Giving up my emotions for His steadfastness

We went to London for the day today! It was so amazing. I love getting to explore a new city. We saw all the tourist spots and took crazy pictures (I'll post them soon enough but I have to get them off of various cameras). We got to go to Hillsong's tenth anniversary. Which was in a huge arena(the O2 arena, which meant nothing to me)and Delirious played. Tomorrow starts the actual routine of Transit. I'm leading the morning prayers, and then we're spending a day in The Boiler house doing something with Sally, not sure what. Tuesday we're working with Besom, which is the service part of Transit, blessing people in great need. Wed, we're going to one of the colleges to pass out some bags for new students and make connections and invite them to a house meal at the Boiler House. Thursday we are working with Bar N' Bus, which is like a community bus that has a coffee bar in it, and gives out free food and has a prayer room in it. And then it has a bunch of games and X-boxes and stuff. Good craic(as Mike would say). So we'll just ben hanging out with them and loving on them. Hopefully building good relationships within the community, our house is right next to the park we're they all hang out, which is pretty cool. Then friday we go into the schools, to start of prayer rooms. So its a busy week, and I'm so excited! Keep praying for rest, and patience and just taking in all that God has for me.

TRANSITion

Well for the most part I really am loving it here, but its been much harder on my body than I expected it to be. I haven't gotten much sleep at all which has been making me more emotional and therefore I take things more to heart and I just sort of feel really depressed. But God has freed me from depression so I can therefore claim it! We just got out of a three day retreat sort of thing where we had some teaching and played some team building games and then we all told our life stories. So it was really interesting to get to know everyone. I learned a lot of awesome things about people and the reasons for why they are the way they are. I know God is going to majorly stretch me while I'm here, there are so many unresolved things in my and Gos has told me that He wants to work those things out. And He just wants to love on me in this time. He really is so good! I had the most awesome prayer time today just basking in His grace. Keep praying that God will give me rest and perseverance. I don't want to take this time for granted.
love yall! (or as they say here "yous")
Shirelle